


Oh Howard

by Ohmypeggy



Category: Agent Carter (TV), Captain America (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Moving On, My First AO3 Post, Through the Years, after the war, basically everyone is friends in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-26
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-06 07:19:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4212879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ohmypeggy/pseuds/Ohmypeggy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Peggy Carter agrees to be the godmother of Howard Stark's firstborn. She wants nothing more to see her one of her best friends happy. They had suffered so much. Three instances of Peggy's and Howard's life after the war.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oh Howard

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly I see Howard and Peggy as bffs. Steve isn't in this, but he's mentioned in passing throughout.

 

Howard’s office was a mess; papers were stacked almost impossibly high on his deck, empty bottles scattered the table and the couch beside it had a heap of clothes on it.

“Howard, are you living here?” Peggy asked half in amusement half in disgust.

The man beckoning her over to the couch as he pushed the clothes onto the floor. “Work.” He mumbled as he fell onto it, the drink in his hand almost spilling over.

Peggy had a guess that was not his first one of the day. She poured herself a drink of whatever was left in a bottle on the table turned bar, then joined him on the couch. Neither said anything for a moment yet they were content. Then Howard spoke.

“Maria’s pregnant”

“Oh.”

Howard nodded, “You're the first to know.”

“I feel honored.”

Howard downed the rest of his drink and Peggy took a small sip of hers.

“How is Maria doing?”

“She’s great, taking the news calmly.”

Peggy was not surprised by this news; Maria was definitely the calmer of the two. She had approved of Howard’s bride the first time she had met her. And the fact that Howard kept seeing her, it did not take long for Peggy to know this was the one. The wedding was beautiful, finally something to celebrate. Howard had joked he wanted Peggy to give him away but she insisted she only wanted to be a guest, and she was; sitting in the front row by Edwin Jarvis. She tried to keep her mind on Howard and Maria yet it still wondered to Steve. The ‘what could have beens’ always seemed to be there. Even now, as dusk settles on them, she thinks about Steve and how he would have reacted about the news. How he would have reacted if she had told him the same news. She snapped that thought out of her head, this was not the time nor place to think unrealistic, inappropriate and girl-like thoughts.

“The baby will need godparents.” He turned to her, bringing her back to the second floor in Howard Stark’s business office in New York City.

Peggy searched Howard’s face for expression. “Howard-”

“Rogers would be a great godfather, no?” He asked, getting up and going back to refill his drink. His fingers brushed over several bottles before he picked up the right one.

Peggy’s heart fell to the floor. “Steve?”

Howard nodded, sitting back down and crossing his legs, like he had just made a comment about the weather outside. “I would ask him in a heartbeat, and he would be honored.” Howard was not wrong there, Peggy realized. Howard gripped his glass harder and she prayed it would not shatter all over her and the gray couch.

“He would be so damn honored.” Peggy leaned closer to Howard and placed her hand on him arm, his grip relaxed.

“He would.”

“But I can’t do that. So the kid will have to settle for just having a godmother.” He readjusted himself, forcing Peggy to let go. Now he was back to facing her and his words set in.

“Me?” Emotions were running through her and she had not settled on which one felt right for this moment.

Howard gave her puppy eyes. “I love you Peggy. Maria loves you. Steve loved you. This baby will love you too. I just know it. If these past years have taught me anything, it’s that life is but momentary and I want to have everything in order for when this moment ends. Peg, please, say yes?”

Peggy blinked the tears away, Howard had seen her cry before and she did not want a repeat. “After that speech? Of course I’ll be the godmother Howard, if that’s what you both want.”

* * *

 

Howard came rushing into the room and Peggy jumped up.

“Peggy it’s a boy.”

“Oh Howard!” She rushed towards him and wrapped him into a hug. He gave her a kiss on the cheek.

“I’m a father.”

“Yes I suppose you are.” Peggy looked at the man in front of her. He had not sleep in over a day yet his eyes were brighter than ever. He was a madman and she could not thing of a more deserving person to have a baby. A new beginning. Peggy wondered if this was enough to change his ways; if this boy would keep Howard grounded and perhaps away from the drinking. Maybe his projects would take the backseat.

“Do you want to meet him?” He asked, already guiding her to the wooded doors back towards the rooms. Peggy was lead to a room and Howard opened to door for her. She was surprised by the bareness of the room. Peggy expected balloons and cards and stuffed animals and flowers and there was none of that.

“We haven't told the press yet, obviously. It’s parents only for now.” He said, nodding his head to the sleeping, yet still beautiful even after just giving birth, Maria.

"Parents?”

“As in biological and god.” He answered. “Tony’s in here.” He reached into the basket by Maria, and carefully pulled out a bundle.

“Oh Howard.” She opened her arms and the small bundle was placed in it. Howard brought out a chair and Peggy settled down into it. “Tony?” She asked the baby. He was awake and his brown eyes starred up at the stranger.

“Well really he’s named Anthony, after her late brother.”

“He’s beautiful.” She told him, then looked back down to Tony, “Hello darling.” She kissed his forehead, feeling overjoyed. She had been worried being announced as godmother. Once the press found out, she had made the papers, the headline claiming _Captain America’s pals still close years later; Carter as godmother._ The article went on to include photos of Steve, Howard and herself and touched on the bond the three had shared. It was a moving piece yet Peggy felt even more pressure about having to watch out for Howard Stark’s firstborn.

“Do you want kids?” Howard asked, watching Peggy rock his son to sleep. He picked up a cup of coffee of the end table and took a sip, knowing he put Peggy on the spot.

“I don’t know. SHIELD keeps me on my toes. I love it though.”  

“They would fall apart without you.”

Peggy was happy to steer him away from the topic of kids. She has not really thought about the future; but now, sitting in the hospital, holding the most adorable baby, she did not think it was such a bad life. “So would you Howard.” She replied.

“Witty as ever I see. If tony comes out that way, I’ll know where he gets it.”

“Promise me something?” She had been thinking about what she was about to say, and rehearsing the lines in her head to make sure they came out alright.

“Hhmm?”

“Promise you won’t ever need me.”

“Pegs, I’ll always need you!”

“You know what I mean Howard. You love and cherish this boy. Don’t waste any of the time you have with him.” She already sounded like a mom.

“Okay.”

“And do be carful.”

“Okay.” Somewhat justified with that answer, Peggy gave a small nod. She feared Howard did not really get her point, but she did not want to spell it out when there was such a positive energy in the room.Howard, as annoying as he was, was her best friend. She could not spare being alone.

* * *

Peggy woke up to Daniel calling from the other room.

“Peggy! Peggy!”

Fearing that her husband had suffered yet another fall, she jumped out of bed and rushed into the kitchen. Thankfully he was seated at counter with the phone up to his ear. She exhaled, and slowed down to a walk as she approached him.

“It’s a man.” Was all he said as he handed her the phone. His face was unreadable as he kissed her cheek and walked away.

Peggy took his place on the stool. “Hello?” Peggy tried to think of who could be calling. She ruled out her children and friends from her book club but could not think of who could be on the other end. Daniel looked on from the couch, as confused as she was. Then the man spoke.

“Ms. Carter?” She was so taken back she did not even correct him on her married name. She had not heard his voice in years, an accent like his stood out as much as her own.

“Edwin! It’s been so long! How are you?” She remembered Howard’s old assistance and did not realize how many years had passed since they had met. He was a lifesaver when she had first started SHIELD and the two had to clear Howard’s name.

“Have you seen the news lately?” He asked, completely ignoring her questions and not sharing the upbeat tone she had used. Peggy wondered why a man she had not talked to in years had called out of the blue to ask about the news report. She tried not to think.

“No.”

“Turn it on.”

Peggy turned to Daniel, standing, she shouted, louder than necessary, “The television! News!” she repeated. Daniel fumbled with the remote and got the local news up. Daniel let out a low whistle as he watched, still standing. Peggy stretched to read the headline.

“I’ll call you back Edwin.” And with that she placed down the receiver and practically floated to the television area. Time stood still. She could see the seconds pass by yet she was numb.

“Ohmygod.” She kept repeating as she approached. “Ohmygod.”

Her eyes flicked to the screen, then to the words scrolling at the bottom.

“Peggy?” And suddenly Daniel was there. She could not even get the words out.

_Howard_

“Honey sit down.”

Daniel’s voice was so far away. He reached out for her but she hit his hand away.

“Howard!” She screamed. Just as her voice started working, her eyes because full. Not even trying to hold back, she let them fall as she screamed. She covered her mouth as the reporter spoke;

_“Howard Stark, brilliant billionaire inventor, and wife have died in a car crash. The couple were reportedly driving early this morning when the car ran off the road. Police are investigating if any fowl play was involved.”_

Peggy hated the reporter.

“Howard!” She screamed from under her covered mouth. She was shaking. Or was the room shaking. Everything was blurry.

Suddenly she was back in the control room. Coordinates. Water. Eight o’clock on the dot.

“Peggy?” She finally allowed herself to be lead to the couch, and Daniel sat beside her, rubbing his hand on her back.

“He’s gone.” She whispered.   

“I know.”

“There has to be something wrong. This isn't true. He just wanted off the grid or something. Typical Howard.” She laughed as more tears spilt.“I haven't seen him in a few years. He called last week and I told him I was busy and would call him back.” Peggy could not hide from the truth. She knew. The truth was terrible, just like the world she lived in. “I’m alone.” Suddenly, realizing what she had said, she looked at her husband. “I mean-”

“I know.” He gave a small smile. Daniel was the perfect husband. Really.

Then another photo popped up on the screen and she saw herself. She was younger here from back right after the war. Then a photo of Steve, Howard and herself, the same one used in the paper when she cleared Howard’s name. Peggy let out another cry. For Steve or Howard or herself she did not know. She could not hear what was being said onscreen.

Daniel picked up the remote with his freehand to turn it off, but the picture changed again and Peggy made a noise to tell him not too. Before the title even appeared on the screen, the words were out of her mouth.

“Tony. Baby.” She had seen him countless times since his birth, yet all she could picture was the baby, feeling nothing but pure joy as she looked at him. She was there for him at every event. She cheered for him at his graduation and science showcases, bragged to her friends that he was accepted into MIT at fifteen, and fussed at him when she learned of his bad habits.

“I have to call him.” She sniffled.

“You’re not okay, Peggy, just wait. He’s probably occupied right now anyway.”   But Peggy shook her head and shakily stood and walked back to the counter.   

“I”m the only family he's got, Daniel!” The words felt wrong coming out. She would not have to explain her motivation to Steve. She scowled herself for thinking that at a time like this as she dialed what she hoped was still his personal number.

A young man answered. “I’m sorry, Tony Stark is not currently taking-”

Peggy interrupted him, wanting to hear Tony’s voice. “This is Peggy.” Was all she could muster. But it was enough.

“Of course, hold on.” The voice was gone and Peggy could hear muffling in the background. She saw Tony as a baby, crawling towards her.

“You’re the only person he’s talked too.” Said the voice. Then there was a new speaker.

“Peggy?” Tony’s voice cracked. Peggy wondered if he had been sleeping, drinking, or crying. She could not care less about any of that now. He was here. He was alive. Tony was the only branch connecting her to her best friend. She is remembering his face when she gave him a red bike for Christmas when he was three.

“Hello darling.” She said, remembering him calling when he is eight, wondering why his father never has time for him.

“You heard?” Now he is seventeen and parentless.

“Yes.” And, not for the first time, Peggy was speechless. She wanted to comfort Tony, tell him she knows how it feels. Say something positive. But all she could get out is gasps of breath. She tried to hold it in. “Tony-I am so sorry.” 

“Can-Will-I really want you here for everything, Peggy?”

The hopelessness in his voice was almost unbearable. She looked at Daniel. He was watching her. “Of course. I’ll be on the next plane.” She told them both.

Now most of her favorite memories were clouded by these unpleasant ones, making Peggy realize how much had happened in such a short time. She felt hollow. The last twenty five years have been a dream. She wants to wake up now. There are new recruits coming in today and Colonel Phillips wanted her there. And yet, as she sat talking to Howard Stark’s son, the heir to whatever he wants, who was now legally hers to look after, she knew the truth. Steve, and now Howard, were gone out of her life and she was the last one.

* * *

ta-da! Hope you liked it and review! 

 


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